Monday, 20 May 2013

My Will Oldham Story - the FINAL Installment

Okay, so I’ve kept you waiting long enough haven’t I?

Here is how the story ends.

After the gig Will Oldham was swapping wardrobe tips with Calexico (before you get too baffled by that fact, they were discussing the merit of vintage waistcoats) and I was stood about 4 yards away discussing with G, Rob and Garo the “Should I / Shouldn’t I?” talk-to-him dilemma.  I was there, holding the CD with my cover of the Bonnie Prince Billy song “Ease Down The Road” and I had totally psyched myself up to give it to him leading up to my trip to West Virginia’s Mountain Stage.  

But when we finally came to be in the same room he had these intense eyes, he barely spoke to anyone pre-show (I put this down to him getting into character) and frankly, he wasn’t putting out a ‘come-up-and-talk-to-me’ vibe.  And so I was nervous about approaching him.

Eventually Rob told me to, “Get a grip, he’s right over there and he’s just a guy so go talk to him if you want to.  It’s no big deal.” – Easy for you to say Mr. Robert B. Campanella!  And so I took a deep breath and marched on over there. 

Me: “Excuse me for interrupting (your discussion about vintage waistcoats).  I wanted to say how much I enjoyed your show.  I’m a big fan, and I have even covered one of your songs on one of my singles.” 

I shoved the CD into his hands, he looked down at it... 

...insert awkward silence here...

Me: “So if you hate it, then you hate my guts”

...More awkward silence... I turn around and walk away...

Will Oldham (speaking to the back of my head): I liked your set.

Blushing giggles in the back of the tour van, "He liked my set, he liked my set!" cue copious amounts of wine at the after show.  The after show!  This is where we'll become new best friends over a few drinks and some vol-au-vents...everyone loosens up after free hotel wine and black olive tapenade, right?

... And then he'll invite me to tour the world with him.  I'll sing on his album, he'll sing on my album.  I'll move to Kentucky, we'll be neighbours.  I'll make him a pie for his birthday.  He'll whittle a flute for me out of a twig.  I'll learn to play that flute.  I'll become the greatest twig/flute player the world has ever known, and I'll owe it all to him.  Good ol' Will, my new best friend.

But he didn't come to the after show.

That’s right folks, I’ve met Bonnie Prince Billy, and unfortunately we are not new best friends.  He might remember the girl who once said "If you hate it, then you hate my guts" though.


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